Dead end

“I don’t wanna know I don’t wanna know I don’t wannaa know I don’t wanna know what I do without you”

Death is something we really don’t want to talk about but it is something we should really need to talk about. For example when an old person will say something about what he likes when he is dead or anything we always say “Wag kang magsalita ng ganyan”.

Maybe because we are really scared of what reality really is. Death is equals to end. And we hate endings. Now I’m scared because my parents are not getting younger anytime now. My father is already 60 while my mother is 47. And still all 4 of us are still in school and very much dependent with them. Like now my father didn’t work for two days now because he is having migraine or vertigo. He is senior citizen na but he is still working at sa Cavite pa. Imagine everyday back and forth Manila to Cavite. I know malapit na siyang mag retire and I really scared of that coz I think I need to work for them now. It’s pay back time ika nga. And I’m really scared with that kind of responsibility.

Now I said to myself I will not marry very old man. My reason is because I’m just scared that he might not see my children grow or achieved something. Yun lang naman yung kinakatakot ko.

I always think what will be my cost of death. Tapos if for example ngayon ako mamatay how my friends, classmates will know about that. Will someone cry for me? Will they say good things about me? Will I go to heaven or hell? So many questions…. Yet to be answered…

When I die, I want to be cremated. Because I saw the price differences and ang mahal pala mamatay. Mamatay ka talaga sa presyo. Tsaka gusto ko sandali na lang ang lamay. Mga 2-3 days lang. tama na ang dramahan… hehehehe…

As I always say, pag hindi na ako nag po-post ditto malamang sa hindi patay na ako… awooooooo!!!